Things I have learned this week:
- I have the most awesome and supportive parents in the entire universe
- I have learned that after years of never quite saying the right things, my father has finally mastered the fine art of talking to his daughter, with words that brought a tear to my eye (both of them actually)
- It’s okay to be comfortable with the fact that certain situations make you uncomfortable. Lady GaGa really got it right with the whole Born This Way thing. You go girl.
- Guys that tell you that they are mature and not like all of the other guys you have dated end up being immature and exactly like every other guy you have dated.
- You can walk away from a long weekend at a cottage and only be thankful for the golden tan that can now be found on your body
- Golden tans are sexy and it is okay to check out your arms and legs every 10 minutes or so.
- Tan = next to no makeup = more sleep = heaven
- When you wonder out loud why you have never ran into that guy you used to date (and will probably always have some feelings for) in like three years – you will run into him later that night
- Being blindsided is not fun – I don’t care how many movies they make about it
- Realizing that those butterfly feelings that you used to feel for said ex are now gone, completely overrides the fact that you also realize that you will always carry a bit of him around with you (I decided on a lock of hair…since he is going bald anyways, he’ll just think it is nature taking its course). We can’t always dust off all the dirt from our shoulder – I don’t care how many rap videos tells us that we can
- Holly Conlan is a fantab singer and everyone should check her out. EVERYONE
- I may not have a large surplus of friends, but the ones I do have, I would not trade for anything in this world….with the exception of a lot of money and James Franco. But, since neither of those things will happen, I will not be trading any friends
- Coral and Fuchsia lipstick should be worn when you have a tan
- The Wiggles creep me out….maybe even more so than Barney. I am really not sure who to kill first
- As my mother has said, I like to run towards red flags (particularly with boys) and I think that I need to figure out why that is. Maybe, I just enjoy being a sadist.
- Ladies Learning Code is kicking ass and taking names. Legit – give us your name by signing up for our e-mailing list right here: http://list.ladieslearningcode.com Promise not to kick any asses though – metaphors people!
- I can have amazing willpower when I really want to. Some may call it stubbornness, but I prefer to use words that can be found on a resume as opposed to a dating site.
- If you are going to puke, do so in the toilet. Fishing for onion chunks with your hand at 2am so that your sink will stop clogging, is not a good look for anyone.
- It’s good to yell at your puke, tell it who’s boss, say “I don’t even like onions. What was I thinking when the hot dog stand man made me a bed of grilled onions on a bun when I stated I did not like hot dogs – screw you hot dog man”
- Not responding to texts about how gorgeous you looked that night, from a guy that you were once “involved” with is a mature and respectable decision that had nothing to do with the fact that you were busy cleaning your own onion puke-chunks from your parents bathroom sink.
- Not replying to more texts the day after, just calls for a pat on the back and some chocolate…obvi.
I have learned more than that, but I am tired, and if I have learned anything this year, it’s to listen to your sleepy self, because she is a total bitch if you don’t.
Title: OK – By: Holly Conlan