Comedy · Dating/Relationships · Friends · Social Media

A friend of mine is online dating. Today, he sent me the profile of a girl that “Winked” at him. Underneath the picture is what she has written in her profile. I took the courtesy of bolding her strong points and letting my friend know why they really stood out for me (in red). When I see the way people talk about themselves, I totally understand why online dating is basically an essential service these days.

The first thing people notice about me is the way I speak to people with confidence and intelligence. I’m usually not a shy person when it comes to meeting new people, however if I start getting attracted to somebody, I could become a little nervous. I wish that people would notice that I’m not like anyone else they have ever met before. Really? Like no one ever before? Is it because she wears the hugest fake eyelashes? I wish they would notice more the personality than anything else. How can anyone see beyond those things on her eyes?? I’m often deemed as “unapproachable” by a lot of men, because of my looks. Men shouldn’t think about what their chances are with pretty girls..they should just go talk to them ! This is called a humble brag. She is calling herself pretty without saying “I’m hot” and making it seem like a curse. Yeah, being good looking gets you nowhere.

The most important thing I am looking for in a person is being a good listener.  You’re fucked. There’s no point in conversating with someone who doesn’t bother to listen to what’s important to you. Even if they don’t share the same views as you, it’s important to respect other people’s thoughts and feelings. While looks are a natural first attraction…intelligence, trust and communication in a relationship hold much more weight.

Overall, I am a calm, funny and kind person. I lead an interesting and exciting life This means she is a professional escort which I am grateful and fortunate for. My mother is Ukrainian and my father is Czech. Growing up, I learned how to speak both languages, therefore I am trilingual. I also have my green belt in Karate and blue belt in Jiu Jitsu. Currently I am in a collaborative media program at Western & Fanshawe. I graduated from Humber she has good taste in schools last year for Criminal Justice and now I am majoring in Film so she is a wannabe actress/model. In my free time I enjoy playing squash, watching movies and travelling to new places.

My friend said that she sounded like a nightmare. Reading this and knowing him, it would be the worst match in the world. I thought these dating sites were supposed to bring “compatible” people together? Tell me again how this is any easier than meeting someone in the good old fashion spontaneous encounter way? Dating confuses me enough….online dating gives me anxiety.


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