Comedy · Friends · Life · Social Media · Television · Toronto · Writing

Diary of the Unemployed: Day 5

It’s 2 in the afternoon and I am drinking a beer. It’s the television’s fault, though. I was sitting with my pup, looking for jobs and sussing out any freelance writing opportunities, when some talk show (The Social to be exact) decided to showcase all these different beers and things you could mix with it to “spice” them up. Personally, I am a beer lover and do not think that beer ever needs any spicing up (unless it’s ice, dark rum and lime because Dark & Stormy’s are God’s gift to man). Anyway, that is not the point. The point is, I was just minding my own business when this show had to bring on several different kinds of beer and just…throw them in my face. At first, I texted a friend and was like “Is it sad that I am feeling this way?” Said friend was all “No, just you talking about wanting a beer is making me want a beer.” So I sat there for a moment and then went for the fridge, because, why not? I have nowhere to be and no one to impress (my dog already loves me). I stopped at just one though because I am trying to save them for my birthday on Friday I am not an alcoholic. I’d like to say that having a beer at 2pm while at work was not an option for me, but sadly it was. I won’t lie, a few lunches over the course of the 3 summers that I was at my last place of employment were spent on a patio, enjoying a few beers or Caesar’s. God, maybe I will miss that place. Sorry to say, but drinking that beer has been the highlight of my day. I applied for some jobs, but nothing I really think that I am actually qualified for. I feel like the boredom of not really having anywhere to go is really setting in. I cannot believe that it is only Wednesday. I cannot believe that it is not even 5pm. I cannot believe that one of my past times is now watching my dog lick his balls. I think I am heading into “rut” territory and I need to be jolted out. Maybe I will take a deeper look into this whole Pinterest thing. I signed up a while ago and had next to no interest in it. I logged on again a few months later and still did not get what everyone was raving about. Maybe I just needed to lose my job in order to discover my love for Pinterest. Perhaps I could even write a book on my experience. Something like Eat Pray Love but more so Eat Pin Watch Dog Lick Balls. I might be on to something here….

photo(37)I’m sorry, but Bosco is pretty much the only thing I have to take a picture of



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